The Crazy Adventures of Shannon Hannigan

Hi, my name is Shannon, and I have something of a curse. It all started when I was 16 – in fact, it was my 16^th birthday. I had the brilliant idea of dressing up to look older, and then go to a bar.

It was a Monday night, and the bartender wasn’t expecting someone underage to sneak in. They keep an eye out for that on Fridays and Saturdays, sure, but who tries to sneak in on a Monday? I was counting on that!

It worked, I went around back, and avoided the bouncer, and then once inside, I sat at a table with a guy sitting by himself. He was fairly good looking, and had a beer, so I knew he was at least 21. I wasn’t looking for him to buy me alcohol; that’s not why I was here.

“Hi there,” I greeted with a smile.

He grinned at me. “What’s a pretty little thing like you doing in a crappy bar like this?”

I shrugged flirtatiously. “It’s my birthday.” I didn’t specify which one, and refused to answer when he asked. I let him assume I was old enough.

“Well then, let me buy you a drink,” he offered.

“You don’t have to do that,” I replied honestly. I really wasn’t here to get drunk. I wanted something else.

“No, I insist.”

I nodded reluctantly, and he ordered me a Long Island Iced Tea. I figured it couldn’t be too bad since it was an iced tea. The drink made me really giggly and flirty, and I happily accepted a second… or was it a third?

Soon, he was asking if I wanted to talk more back at his place. I was disappointed since I wanted to do more than talk, but I thought, hmm I can always talk him into it. He walked me to his car, and gave me a ride to his place.

Once there, I was embarrassed to realize that I needed to use the bathroom, which was absolutely disgusting! I hovered over the seat, and did my business as quickly as possible. I was tempted to let it air dry because I didn’t want to risk touching the toilet paper – which was stained with brown finger prints, but I decided to remove that portion, and use a clean piece.

As I tried to see my appearance in the mirror, I wondered how to get him to have sex with me. Yes, I know (now) that 16 is still too young to spread my legs, but I… I really can’t explain it. I felt like I was going to die if I didn’t have sex as soon as possible!

I had spent far too many nights in bed with only my fingers between my legs! I couldn’t remember spending more than 10 minutes in a row without feeling like my body was on fire with a need. I was going to get laid if I had to tie him to his bed and do it all by myself!

I exited the bathroom before the urge to clean if from ceiling to floor completely replaced my desire to seduce the poor guy, and nearly walked into him in his kitchen. I giggled, and apologized for not looking where I was going. He gave me a strange look… It took me a moment, but I realized that he was wondering how to talk me into his bed.

I grinned, and decided to say something completely lame. “Hey… Why don’t you show me what your bed looks like?”

He looked utterly relieved, like he was glad that I had brought it up before he looked like a total loser. He smiled, and grabbed my hand. “It’s this way.”

In his room, I kissed him, and sighed happily as he started to remove my clothes. I was so grateful that my parents thought I was spending the night at a friend’s house! I opened his pants, and felt the forbidden anatomy for the first time.

Having removed my shirt and bra, he kissed me – exploring my mouth with his tongue, and I was in heaven! I stroked and rubbed his shaft eagerly, and he groaned. He pushed me up against the wall, pushed my skirt out of the way, and pulled my panties to the side.

“I can’t wait anymore1” He insisted, and started to shove himself inside me. Most girls might have found this painful or a bit abrupt, but not me. I was so ready! I will admit that I did feel a sharp pain for a second, and inhaled a gasp.

He froze, and stared at me in surprise. “Was that? Did I? Are you a virgin?”

“Not anymore, now please keep going,” I urged him, biting his neck and kneading his butt with my fingers.

I could tell that he may have done things differently if he had known I was a virgin, but I liked it fine the way things were. He finally decided that it was too late to change our circumstances now, and pulled out slightly to thrust in again. He pounded into me, and I chanted, “Oh yeah.” I hadn’t meant to say anything, but it felt so damn good!

A few minutes later, he decided that up against the wall was too awkward, and so he sat me on his dresser. After that, he decided that on the bed might be for the best after all. His bed squeaked, and made a horrible racket! It honestly destroyed my concentration, and I longed to tell him to roll me onto the floor.

Then, I heard someone stomp on the floor of the apartment above us, and another person bang on the other side of the wall. They obviously wanted us to be quiet, and that made everything a hundred times better! I started moaning loudly, and my chant changed to “Oh God!”

The bed continued to squeak, and even banged on the wall. I continued to shout out my pleasure, and he decided to join in by moaning and grunting. The neighbors could both be clearly heard screaming, “Will you stop fucking around in there?!”

They gave up when their throats got hoarse, and I wondered if they had called the police. I say that would be an awesome story to tell my friends! ‘I’m serious; we pissed off the neighbors, and had the police come tell us to fuck quietly!’ I nearly laughed out loud just thinking about it!

Then something strange happened… We had been going at it for about an hour, and I was starting to feel sore. Almost burnt. I hadn’t expected that. I wiggled my hand between us, and rubbed myself.

Someone screamed, and I thought the neighbors were yelling at us again, but it turned out to be me. I screamed, and my whole body shook like never before. I shoved my free hand into my mouth in an attempt to stifle to noise, and saw him laugh.

He continued to pound into me until I stopped shaking and screaming, and then informed me, “Glad to be of service! My turn.”

I nodded even though he wasn’t asking permission. I knew that he could be about to impregnate me, but the risk seemed worth it. He surprised me by pulling out completely, and squirting all over my stomach and breasts.

Ugh! I wasn’t sure how I felt about that. The good news was that I wouldn’t get pregnant. The bad news was that I was covered in guck!

He saw the ambivalent look on my face, and chuckled. “Don’t worry, we can take a shower.”

A shower?! In his bathroom? I wasn’t entirely sure that it was possible to get clean in that disaster!

Not really having a choice – especially since I was pretty sure my parents would be able to smell it on me if I didn’t wash it off – we went to the bathroom, and he turned the water on. I was so relieved to see that the inside of the shower was, um, better than the rest of the bathroom. Not by much, mind you, but it should work.

Flirting in the shower was almost more fun than the sex had been! I soon forgot to be disgusted by the scum and the grime, and simply enjoyed the playing and the petting. By the time we were done, I was ready to go get dirty again!

“Hey…” he must have realized that he still didn’t know my name, but then decided not to ask in case I had told it to him and he just couldn’t remember. I decided he was being sweet by trying not to offend me. It’s not like I had asked his either. “Um, there’s this thing I heard about, and I wondered how open you are to trying new stuff.”

“My first time was with a stranger from a bar, I’d say that I’m pretty open to trying new things,” I pointed out.

“Right,” he grinned.

I followed him back to his bedroom, and stood in front of him as he sat on the bed. He asked me to suck on him, and I thought, why not? I took him in my mouth, and was grateful that he told me what to do and gave me tips on how to do it better.

“Ok, I’m going to swing this back and forth, and I want you to watch it while you suck, okay?”

I nodded, intrigued. I watched the large gold cross as it swayed back and forth for a few minutes, and wondered what he was trying to do. He finally started to speak.

“You feel relaxed. Your jaw does not hurt, and you understand exactly how to make a guy spill his load. This is easy and enjoyable for you.”

I still had my mouth full, so I couldn’t say, ‘yeah, right!” I suppressed the urge to roll my eyes, and found that the cross still caught my attention. I watched it and everything faded. I realized that he was right; I did find this easy and enjoyable. My mouth and jaw did not hurt, and somehow I knew exactly what to do to make him squirt.

I still wasn’t sure if I wanted him to squirt, especially with it in my mouth, but I did know how to make him do it. I pondered what to do. I was having fun, and was in no hurry to finish. I vaguely heard a church bell start to ring the midnight hour.

“You’re doing great!” He praised me. “I am going to fill your mouth soon, and I want you to swallow it. After that you will no longer be in a trance.”

Don’t they all?! I thought sarcastically.

“But, before I do, I am going to ring this bell. Anytime you hear a bell ring, you are going to have an uncontrollable urge to suck a guy off.”

I nearly snorted! Right, that’s gonna happen! I couldn’t wait for him to stop swinging that damn cross and shoot his load already so that I could tell him exactly what I thought of his stupid trick!

He rang the bell like he said he would, and then a moment later, his shaft started pulsating, which tickled my tongue a bit. I licked it curiously to feel how it moved. I completely forgot that he was squirting in my mouth until I swallowed it. I hadn’t really planned to do that, but whatever, it was done now.

When he was completely done, I leaned back to look him in the eyes. “What kind of lame crap were you trying to pull? I was already giving you a blowjob; you didn’t need to try hypnotizing me into doing it.

“I guess it didn’t work, oh well,” he shrugged. I shook my head and laughed. It was pretty funny, and I bet he wouldn’t try it again.

We heard a bell ring from somewhere else in the apartment. I cocked my head to the side, and gave him a wondering look. He blushed guiltily.

“It’s my roommate. He’s not very good looking, and we thought we’d try this.” He shrugged as if to say, ‘can you blame us?’

I sighed. “Fine, I’ll give him a blowjob too. No one should have to endure abstinence if they don’t want to.” I prayed that his roommate was not hideous.

To my relief, he was merely chubby. I thought he looked good, and wondered why they thought he had to resort to tricks. He had an incredulous look on his face like it was Christmas and his birthday all in one.

My lover decided to pretend things had turned out the way they hoped. “It worked! She’s totally hot for you now. She heard the bell, and just has to suck you off!”

I chose to play along. I had already agreed to do this, so what did it matter if I let him believe that I was compelled by a bell. I cast him a sultry look.

“Dude! That’s awesome!” He tossed aside a blanket covering a naked erection, and I realized that he must have been practically tortured by our earlier loud as hell screwing.

I knelt in front of him, and took him in my mouth. My mind wandered, and I reanalyzed every word that had been spoken while I was supposed to be in a trance. The nerve of that guy! Good thing I actually wanted to do this, or I think I would have bit it off back when he tried to tell me to have an uncontrollable urge to give head every time I heard a bell ring. Men!

As my mind was toiling over the situation these two had tried to create, my mouth was worshiping the chubby guy’s hardness. I felt like a professional! You know, like a porn star or something.

I found if very entertaining to watch the expressions on his face, and took it as a challenge to see just how goofy a face I could get him to make. He started gasping and moaning, and I would have grinned if my mouth was free. I licked the drops oozing from him, and knew he would not be able to last much longer.

He grunted like he was in pain, but I knew he couldn’t be because he was gushing like crazy. I would have laughed, but I was busy gulping it down. You know, this stuff really isn’t as bad as most girls say it is. I bet they just think it is because it’s – well – basically warm salty goo.

I felt impish, and continued sucking on him until he had completely stopped producing anymore. I sat back to see if he wanted to have sex now. I would do that too if he wanted. I figured it would be horrible of me to work him up, and then just quit.

He flopped onto his back – he had been sitting on the edge of his bed – and I was astounded to realize he had passed out! I shook my head, and turned to look behind me. My lover stood there watching with an odd look on his face, like he couldn’t decide if he was happy that his friend had finally gotten a girl between his legs, or jealous because he had to share me.

“Shouldn’t we help him lay on the bed the right way, and I don’t know, cover him up?” I asked.

“Nah, that wasn’t covered in the hypnoscript. I think we’ll just leave him there. He tosses and turns a lot, and will probably fall off his bed anyway. Even if we did fix how he’s laying.”

I shrugged, and followed my lover back to his room. I had permission to spend the entire night at my friend’s, but this guy might decide to drive me home now. I pushed some of my wildly curly red hair behind my ear nervously.

He stared at me for a moment, probably wondering what to do with me. “Hey, do you want to go home, or stay the night?”

“Stay the night,” I grinned.

“Okay, but let’s try not to piss the neighbors off this time. It must be going on 2 am!”

I nodded in agreement, and we went back to his room. This time, our sex was slow and quiet. We took our time, and did our best not to let the bed squeak. I had no idea that sex could be this fun!

In the morning, I heard cars honking, and that loud ass church bell clanging. My lover’s roommate rang the hand bell he had, and I laughed. I saw my bed mate shake his head as if he too found it funny.

“You’ve created a monster,” I joked.

“I totally did!”

“It’s ok, I don’t mind blowing him again,” I offered.

“If you want, but I’m gonna sleep more.”

I kissed his cheek, and walked to the other bedroom. I smiled, and climbed in bed to give him what he wanted. I have to say that the look on his face made it worth it! He looked at me like I was an angel, and that made me feel inexplicably happy.

Later on, I got a ride home, and thanked my lucky stars that my parents were at work. I had told them that I would get a ride to school from my friend – who had gotten a car for her birthday. Lucky bitch!

I think I grinned the whole week, and wished I had thought to get that guy’s name and number. I bet he’d be willing to have sex with me again sometime! Oh well, maybe I’ll see him around somewhere.

On Sunday, my parents brought me to church. We went every week, and it bored me. I hid it well though by pretending to pay complete attention while really thinking my own thoughts. My very naughty thoughts!

Service started at 11, and normally concluded at noon. Though frequently the pastor rambled on another 15 minutes or so, and then we all sang. I settled myself as comfortably as possible, and patiently waited for it to be over. If I was lucky, maybe he’d forget what he was saying, and finish early.

I was in the middle of reliving my first screaming orgasm with a guy when the church bell started to gong. I smirked as I remembered what I was “supposed” to do every time I heard a bell ring. Wouldn’t that just be hilarious!

I noticed that the guy next to me – who was probably 17 or 18 – didn’t even bother pretending to pay attention. His head rested on the pew, and he snored lightly. I wanted to laugh, or elbow him to wake him up. If I had to sit through this, then so did he!

My eyes roamed his body, and landed in his lap. I stared at his groin, and grew fascinated when I realized that he was pitching a tent! So, not only was he dozing off during service, but he was also having erotic dreams! It just didn’t seem fair!

I reached over and surreptitiously unfastened his pants. I was going to embarrass the hell out of him by leaving his pants hanging open so that when he stood, they’d fall off, and leave him exposed. Maybe next time he’d think twice about falling asleep in church!

After I managed to work his pants open, I placed my hand back in my own lap. He snored slightly louder, and shifted a tiny bit. His erection poked through his boxers, and I stared at it overtly.

Everyone else was paying close attention to the pastor, and therefore not even the person on his other side had noticed that he was hard and ready for all to see. I felt bad for doing this to him, because he was going to get into so much trouble.

The top looked like a mushroom, and I could see blood pulsing inside it. I was dying to know what it tasted like. Just how long would it take him to squirt?

I bent over, and opened my mouth. I licked him, and then sucked on him, happy to have such a beautiful hardness between my teeth. I was having so much fun that I giggled.

I do not remember hearing my parents call out my name in horror. I do not remember the person on the other side of him hitting me on the head to get me to stop. I paid no attention to anything but how to pleasure him, and soon he had a grip on my head and was crying out in ecstasy.

He nearly had a heart attack when he realized that he was still in church, and I nearly died of embarrassment when I realized that the whole church was watching us! What had I been thinking?! I licked my lips, a bit sad that he had cum so quickly, and then slapped a hand over my mouth to cover the grin that I couldn’t stop grinning.

My parents rushed me into the pastor’s office, and we waited for him to send the congregation home. My mother glared at me. My father fidgeted in agitation.

“What were you thinking?” They demanded at the same time.

I shook my head, and knew that I must look baffled. “I don’t know! I just saw it, and I had to know what it tasted like!” I slapped my hand over my mouth again. I did not just say that to my parents!

The pastor finally entered his office, and lectured my on the gravity of my sins. I wondered why no one seemed to be lecturing the guy, but maybe it was because it had been obvious he had been sleeping when I did it. My eyes glazed over as I tried to listen to the lecture, but I think it was obvious that I didn’t care one bit.

My parents finally dragged me home, and ordered me to pack. I thought this was a bit extreme, but figured that if I went to my room and waited it out, this would blow over soon enough. I curled up in my bed, and went to sleep.

The next day, my parents both stayed home from work, and I woke to find that my clothes had been packed while I was asleep. I was confused. Were they kicking me out just because I had given some guy a blowjob in church?!

My father was no longer so angry that he yelled, but I could see by the cold determination that he had made his decision and wasn’t going to change his mind. “I will not have such a sinful daughter in my house! With as little shame as you have, it’s only a matter of time before you find yourself pregnant, and I will not stand by and condone such behavior!”

“You can’t just throw me out!” I wailed, seriously afraid now. What was I going to do?

“No…” My father seemed to grow a tiny bit kind. “The best thing is to bring you to the farm.”

“Farm? You mean grandma’s farm?! But it’s in the middle of nowhere, and she’s dead!”

“Exactly,” my mom nodded. “You’ll be on your own to sin or not as you please, and hopefully it’ll be a bit harder to do so. Plus, we expect you to do farm chores. Maybe that’ll keep you in check!”

I groaned. Maybe sinning really does earn you a one way ticket to hell because that’s exactly where it sounded like I was going. I knew better than to argue. My parents were strict, and never changed their minds.

They drove me out to my grandma’s farm, which they had inherited upon her death, and dropped me off. They informed me that they were transferring me to the local school, and that the bus stop was at the end of the nearly mile long driveway. Great! I sighed sarcastically.

I guess I should be grateful that they were leaving me with a box of food, keys to my grandma’s old clunker – thank god it still worked! – and plenty of money to buy more food for myself when I ran out.

The next day, I missed the bus despite honestly trying to get to the stop on time. I decided that since I had to drive myself anyway, I may as well take my time. I dolled up, and arrived in the middle of second period.

This school was tiny compared to my other one, and I instantly realized that everyone was going to know who I was by the end of the day. Oh well, at least they don’t know why I am here. I think I will actually miss they piece by Beethoven that they played to signal the end of each class. You know Dun Dun Dun Dun!

I walked into my second period – history – and stared at the teacher like he was a freak.

“Ah, Miss Hannigan,” he greeted. “Class, this is our new student, Shannon Hannigan. I expect everyone to make her feel welcome.”

I still stared at him like he was a freak, and he noticed my stare. He cleared his throat. “Miss Hannigan, you have come just in time to study Scottish history. I am of Scottish decent, and like to wear my clan kilt during Scottish week.”

I nodded my head in a way that probably made it clear that I still found him very odd, and he gestured me to en empty seat right up front, in the middle. I sat, and listened as he did his job. He even went so far as to speak with a Scottish accent, and I found it a bit annoying.

Finally, class was over, and the bell rang. It was an old school bell, and it seemed appropriate that this tiny school would still use it. I listened to it ring, and froze.

You know, now that I think about it, my teacher is pretty handsome, and his kilt is just so tempting! I would not be able to move from this spot until I had taken a peak up inside it. I decided to catch him unawares.

I leapt from my desk to right in front of him, dropped to my knees, lifted the front of his kilt, and took his mostly limp penis in my mouth. It was amazing how fast it grew to full size! I hummed in pleasure, and could not believe how good it felt to have him in my mouth.

“Miss Hannigan! Stop that at once! Miss Hannigan?! Stop I say! Stop, Sto…p… Sto…”

My teacher went weak in the knees, and fell against his blackboard. He braced himself on the chalk tray, and I heard him stutter, “St… st.. st..” He started to pant, and I tasted the drops of his pre-cum.

I continued my task, and marveled at how big he was. He couldn’t fit into my mouth! I used my hands a bit more than I’d had to previously, and worked on getting him down my throat.

He started to push on the top of my head, like he remembered that he was supposed to stop me, but he put practically no effort into pushing me away. I laughed, and felt his shaft twitch in response. I fondled his balls, and felt them shrink slightly.

Oh goody! Here it comes! I eagerly drank all he had to give me, and kept sucking until I had every last drop.

He was panting heavily, and I felt extremely pleased with myself. I had such an awesome power in my mouth! I bet that if I blew the president, he’d help me get rich and famous!

I finally slid my mouth off of him with a loud pop, and grinned up at him.

“Miss Hannigan!” He panted, and I could tell that he was torn between congratulating me on a job well done, and scolding me for my inappropriate behavior. I laughed. I bet he has never had such a good blowjob in his life!

I finally noticed that the rest of my class was staring at me in shock. Oh… right! Students didn’t normally suck off their teacher without warning or permission just because the bell rang. And that’s when it hit me; that sonovabitch! He really had hypnotized me into having an overwhelming urge to blow a guy whenever I heard a bell ring!

I glared at everyone as I marched to the principal’s office. She was on old woman… a really old woman. She had to be pushing 90!

“Miss Hannigan,” she addressed me, sounding like one of those old women I’d seen on TV who sounded like they thought they were better than everyone else. “I don’t know what you youngsters think is appropriate these days, but in my day a girl never put such a thing in her mouth in class! We waited for the appropriate time afterwards when no one else would see us!”

I raised one eyebrow, and tried to decide if she had meant to say that, or if she had meant to say something else and had gotten it mixed up. She silently dared me to say something. I was smart enough to keep my mouth shut.

“Really! The shame of it! You are just lucky that there were enough witnesses to attest that Mr. Ferguson was innocent else he’d have lost his job immediately! I’m afraid that I have no choice but to expel you, effective immediately.”

She turned to Mr. Ferguson, who had finally entered the office. “Why on Earth weren’t you wearing a pair of briefs or some boxers?”

“A true Scotsman doesn’t wear anything under his kilt! How was I to know that she’d -” He opted not to go into detail.

Whatever, I had more important things to do. Such as figure out how to unhypnotize myself. I turned and left. If I could just fix what was wrong with me, I could go back home, and this wouldn’t matter anyway.

Over the course of the next month, I was insanely busy! I received a bunch of chickens and a cow from my parents, and had clear instructions not to let them die. With so much to do caring for them and fixing up the farmhouse, I didn’t have time to do anything else!

I received a packet in the mail from the school that had expelled me telling me how to study and test for my GED, or how to enroll in the virtual academy, and I let that slide until I caught up on all my farm chores. I really wish I had someone to show me what to do, figuring it all out myself was frustrating!

I eventually remembered to study, test, and obtain my GED, and I remembered to see a psychologist about my unusual condition. I could tell that he didn’t believe me. It became perfectly obvious when he laughed, and then rang a bell.

He was in the middle of saying, “See! You are not -” when I pounced on him. He fought me off a bit more vigorously than my teacher had, but I still got him to spill his load for me in the end. He stared at me in astonishment, and referred me to a female. I should have thought of that to begin with!

All she did was disbelieve me too, and when she rang her bell, I had no men to attack. This did not mean that I attacked her instead, and for a moment, I thought nothing would happen. I was proven wrong when I paced her office in agitation until I saw a man walk by outside her window.

I frantically opened her window, pushed out the screen, and jumped out. Thankfully, her office was on the first floor! I tackled the man to the ground, unzipped him, and gave him the best head he had ever had in his life. I could tell by the look on his face.

He was probably in his 50’s, and his shocked wife tried to beat me off her husband with her purse. I swear I couldn’t even feel it! I finished getting him off, and then apologized profusely. I couldn’t believe that I had actually attacked him!

“No problem!” He assured me, and his wife gasped in outrage. She started to attack him with her purse.

My therapist raced out of the building the correct way, and quickly explained that I was a mental patient with uncontrollable urges. This pacified the wife, and the couple continued on their way. I couldn’t help but smirk as they walked away. Should I point out that his pants are still unzipped?

There was nothing the therapists could do to help me, though they tried everything they could think of. I stopped going to them, and vowed to just stay away from bells.

I was successful… until the next time I went grocery shopping, and drove by the church at noon. I completely startled the first altar boy I saw – who was thankfully well in his teens. I was so glad that no one saw that! I sped home, and made a note to never go into town at noon!

Months passed, and I actually forgot about my curse, and yes, I have come to consider it a curse. I decided to suck up to my parents by buying them something nice. Though I must admit that I rather liked living on the farm all by myself.

 I walked up to the store, pulling my coat tight around my neck, when a man dressed as Santa started ringing a bell. He was hoping for a donation to charity for Christmas, but I insisted that he give me a donation to my curse! Oh my god! I really am a sinner! Who but a sinner could suck off Santa for Christmas?

Two hours later, my parents arrived to bail me out of jail. My therapists had sent them all the reports on me, so they now at least knew what was wrong with me. It didn’t make them want me to come home, but at least they didn’t treat me like I was doing this on purpose.

It’s probably a good thing that I don’t live at home. Who knew when I’d be in the car with my dad when a bell went off somewhere? I really didn’t want to think about it!

So, as I said, I am cursed. I suppose as far as curses go, I could do so much worse! At least I like giving a guy head. It really does make me happy for a few minutes. You want to know what the real curse is?

The real curse is that I get so caught up in avoiding all the bells I can that I never have an opportunity to have sex! Here I am, living alone in a big house in the middle of nowhere, and I don’t even have someone to warm my bed!

Oh well, maybe for my 17^th birthday – coming up in just 4 months – I’ll sneak into another bar and meet another guy who will take me home. On second thought, I better not. With my luck, he’d probably hypnotize me to strip off my clothes and start fingering myself every time I heard a cat meow!

Hmm… I think I might need to buy a cat…

Go To The Troublemaker