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Friday, April 27, 2012

My Natural Miscarriage

Updated 4-15-13: Since I originally posted this, I have had 1300 views. None have commented, so I don't know if my post has comforted or helped as I intended it to. Based on the two most common searches that direct people to this post, I have decided to give the most helpful info right up front. #1 - Yes, there can be and often is a foul, nasty smell like something died. That is a sign that there is still tissue in there that needs to come out. My smell went away when the last of the tissue came out. If it smells like something other than a dead and rotting corpse - such as yeast or fish - then it could be a sign of infection. See the comment section for my original thoughts on this. And #2 - Can you use a Diva cup during miscarriage? I was told no because the risk of getting infected is much too high. If anyone has tried to use a Diva cup and it worked, please let me know so that others can make a better informed decision. Thank you!

Update 1-21-14 
I've had a second miscarriage which was completely different than the first. You can read about it here: Second Miscarriage 

First off, the term natural miscarriage means having a miscarriage without the use of a surgical procedure called a D&C or using drugs to basically speed things up if they are not progressing in a timely manner. It is much like the term natural birth refers to giving birth vaginally without the use of drugs.

To me, all miscarriages are natural, otherwise they'd be abortions, but I am using the term Natural Miscarriage to refer to the fact that I did it here at home without speedy drugs or surgery. (Fyi, I did not mean any offense by that statement!)

When I was first told that my baby had died, and had been more or less floating lifelessly around inside me for 4 weeks, I was understandably upset, but I quickly decided that I would just go home and wait until it either came out or I became infected and NEEDED medical intervention. The very first thing I did was go online to ask for help from friends on an email forum dedicated to raising healthy children through nutrition. These ladies are VERY smart, and almost always have an answer to any question!

Their overwhelming sympathy helped me a lot, but they also pointed out what little there was on the internet posted by women who had been through this. After reading this account of one woman's Natural Miscarriage, I was inexplicably comforted. I felt like I could do this unexpected and sad task of miscarrying without intervention after all. There were other posts I read, but they were few. There is a site dedicated to miscarriages, and that helped a little too, but really it was reading about others that helped me the most.

That's why I decided that I would post my story on my blog as soon as I felt up to writing about it. Maybe - from this day forward - other women will come across my post here and take comfort from my experience.

To start at the very beginning, I feel it is important to say that I was diagnosed with diabetes in 2001. Both before and after my diagnosis, I had had a very hard time conceiving. I'd been trying since I was 16, and at the time of my diagnosis, I was 21 and married. It took a few years of seriously studying nutrition before I had my condition under control enough to get pregnant, but then I conceived and gave birth to two boys. I was 25 when Gryffin - my first - was born. (To me, that's almost 10 years of trying to conceive, with no luck whatsoever.)

After Phoenix was born - my second - I took what I knew about nutrition and my body and added enough carbs to my diet to prevent conception, but not so many that my diabetes went out of control again. It worked for 5 years. I never once even skipped a cycle - which was actually weird for me. My cycles have been utterly erratic since I got my first one at age 12.

Over the years, more and more carbs wormed their way into my diet, but I'd still probably be considered moderately low carb. Suddenly, I missed a cycle. I contemplated going in to the doctor for an A1C test to see if I had gone too high carb for my body, but decided to just wait and see. When I missed a second cycle, I suspected that I might actually be pregnant, so I took a home pregnancy test. You can read about that here.

Considering that I had never even known I was pregnant with my first two until much later, I decided to wait until I was 12 weeks along before going in again. After all, only one prenatal appointment is needed each month for the first trimester or so. I figured I had no reason to go in. I really didn't. If everything had gone the way it was supposed to, I would have had no need to go in. If I had gone in sooner, I would have just learned the terrible news sooner. It actually wouldn't have changed anything. My baby apparently died just one week after I'd had my pregnancy confirmed. I write about finding out about this in this post.

So now I am at the main point of this post. The actual process of miscarriage. After being given the bad news, I came home to wait for the baby to come out. On Friday April 20th, I started to bleed. Several large clumps came out of me that looked like bits of organ. If you have ever seen chicken liver, then you know what I am talking about.

By Saturday afternoon, I thought the worst was over. I had even almost stopped bleeding completely. It felt like the end of my period - those days when I am still bleeding, but it's so light that I still need my Diva Cup (My Diva Experience), or at least a rag. This made complete sense to me. My regular periods start out kind of heavy, and then end up pretty light. I have little to no cramps, and rarely need anything to cope, not even Advil. As it turns out, that was just the warm up act.

I had no trouble on Sunday. I got out of the house, met up with some friends, and didn't suspect there was more to come. I went to bed early, about 8 or 9 PM. I was tired, and felt justified in going to bed early. I woke up at about 2 AM. There really wasn't a reason I woke up. I felt no pain or anything. This is actually a pattern of mine: going to bed and waking up at random hours, so I thought nothing of it. I kissed hubby goodnight as he went to bed.

Then, around 3:30-4 AM, I noticed that I was having increasingly painful cramps like contractions. I decided to take a double dose of Advil to combat the pain. They didn't help in the slightest! My contractions came fairly regularly, probably less than every 2 minutes. At 4:30 AM, I was online complaining that the pain was more than my natural high tolerance could handle. At 5:18, I was crying, sobbing, and just generally angry at life that this miscarriage business had to hurt so damn much!

I mean seriously! Ever heard of a get out of jail free pass? A miscarriage should be an automatic get out of pain free card! You hear that Mother Nature! You hear that God! We women go through enough pain just being women and having babies. If you are going to decide that - for whatever reason - a particular baby is not going to grow full term and be born, then do a woman the courtesy of NOT making her go through the worst pain imaginable!

Sigh! Anyway, the pain got so bad that I emailed my doctor asking him to prescribe me some vicodin. His nurse called me back just after their office opened up for the day, and I soon had am Rx waiting for me at my nearest pharmacy. Ironically, I didn't really need it by then.

But that's jumping ahead in the story. As I was suffering this horrible pain, I made very frequent trips to the bathroom, because every time a contraction hit, it felt like something wanted to come out. 99% of it was more chunks of placenta and whatever else needed to come out. Wait, that's probably more like 80% of it was blood, and 19 % of it was placenta. You get the idea.

I mostly let my hubby sleep. I knew that I would need him to be up with the kids when they woke up, so I left him alone, BUT... I wanted to kill him for not waking up and holding my hand as I went through this! Our bathroom is literally next to our bedroom, so I kept wondering why he didn't hear me sobbing and come find out why.

It eventually occurred to me that we had a heating pad somewhere around here, and that might help. I couldn't find it, so I woke my hubby up to ask him where it was. As I suspected, he knew exactly where it was, but even though I was sobbing as I asked him my question, he didn't sit up to comfort me or ask me what was wrong. He already knew, and figured that I just wanted to be left alone. I didn't, but as I already said, I knew it was in my best interest to let him sleep and then deal with the kids later.

A half hour after I went looking for the heating pad - which helped a LOT! - I felt dehydrated like I hadn't drank water in YEARS! I sipped on a glass of cold water from my fridge, but it was tap water, and I don't think it helped me hydrate like water should. In desperation, I went in to my bedroom and shook my hubby awake.

"I NEED WATER!!!" I cried out. "Go buy me some from the store!"
"Okay honey, I'll buy you some as soon as I wake up. I don't think I could even drive right now, I'm still so tired."

It was about 6 AM at this point, so he had really only had about 4 hours of sleep. I know he was too tired, but I again had an urge to kill him. I am NOT the type of person to cry, beg, or insist on something unless it is important. At that moment, I was crying, begging, and insisting on something that was vitally important! In frustration, I went back out into the living room to try drinking more cold tap water from the fridge.

A few minutes later, I changed my mind. I wanted orange juice, which would at least coat my throat, and make it feel hydrated as I cried and wailed from the pain. Also, it might help keep it feeling hydrated as I "hee hee hoo hoo" 'd over and over.

At about 7:30AM, I sat down to write an email to a midwife I'd previously consulted with about my pregnancy. I wanted to know how much longer this whole process was going to last, and other questions. By the time I finished it, my water had broken, and then the gestational sac came out.

Yep... my water broke! I really hadn't expected that. I thought the sac would probably come out whole. Prior to any of this, I figured that my womb would only have to open a little, that it wouldn't be any more painful than my regular period, and that the sac would just slip out with no more ceremony than a large blood clot.

BOY WAS I WRONG!!! Maybe now you understand why I thought it was all over after the little bit of stuff I had passed on Friday night. THAT was what I had expected.

After the gestational sac passed - which to me looked like a mostly roundish flat organ-like thing, again kinda like a chicken liver - my pain decreased dramatically, but was still there. I added more to my email message to the midwife, telling her what had happened, and asking if that was it.Was it finally over now? I hit send at 7:57, updated my facebook status, and then went to lie down in bed. I held the heating firmly to my womb area, and breathed as calmly as possible.

It was then that I got the call from my doctor's nurse, and they agreed to prescribe me the vicodin. Irony, right? The call from the nurse woke my hubby up, and he understood enough to realize that I was asking for a pretty serious drug. This must have made it hard for him to get back to sleep, so he got out of bed, and offered to make me breakfast. I was actually pretty hungry by this point, so I asked for eggs, but I just could NOT bring myself to get out of bed, and hovered on the edge of sleep for another couple of hours.

Around 11 AM, I got out of bed, feeling a lot better - and tired - but still wanting that vicodin. We went to the pharmacy, picked it up, and then went to the grocery store to pick up a few things we needed, such as that spring water I had desperately wanted earlier on.

By 3:30 PM, I felt about 90% better than I had 12 hours earlier. Whew! :-) That's the good news. It may hurt, but really it's over pretty quickly. I even went online to ask my friends on the forum full of smart moms whether or not it was okay to use my Diva Cup. The consensus was no, lol! I wasn't really surprised by this verdict :-)

So now that I have been through this experience, I have a few tips to share:
#1 - If you are "lucky" enough to be told that this is going to happen before it actually does, ASK FOR YOUR FAVORITE SERIOUS PAIN KILLER OF CHOICE!!! Yes, you can get through it without painkillers, but unless you have severe reactions to all painkillers, WHY???

#2 - If you - like me - like to avoid paying for environmentally horrible products every month, you absolutely CAN get through a miscarriage using cloth pads. I made just one reference earlier about using rags, but that's exactly what I did. When using my Diva Cup during my period, I use a soft old wash cloth - aka rag - as a back up should my cup leak. 

We have a stack of old rags - a really BIG stack of old rags that my husband and I use for clean up after intimate activity, and I also use them during that time of the month as a back up. During this miscarriage, I couldn't use my diva cup at all, and I didn't want to buy pads just for this, so I carefully selected rags as needed from this stack. For the first heavy bleeding, I used rags that can be more accurately described as old hand towels. These are thick and absorbent, and I'm not entirely sure what they started out as since we've had them since practically the very beginning of our marriage almost 11 years ago.

They measure about 12 inches by like 10 or 11 inches. When folded in half - so that the long side is folded in half - they are just about perfect to replace a pad, except they conform to your body better. I discovered that they don't need to be changed very often. Even with a heavy flow, it still takes a while for the blood to leak through to the other side. I changed them more often than I probably needed to because I have a huge stack of them, and could.

Now that the flow is much lighter, I'm using regular bath time wash cloths. Old ones, but still the standard size of what? 9x9? 10x10? I haven't measured, heh heh. I also fold them in half, and probably wouldn't need to change these more than once a day, except that I want to. After changing the cloths, I let them soak for a bit so that it doesn't look like I murdered someone later on should someone happen to look though them for some reason.

So far, I've gone through less than 2 dozen of them in... 7 days. If wanting to use old rags or cloth menstrual pads during a miscarriage, having at least 2 dozen is a good idea, UNLESS you have regular access to a washing machine. In that case, 6 would probably be more than plenty.

Oh! And #3 - Have a good heating pad ON HAND!!! It'll work even better if you remember to use it before you're at the screaming stage, lol!

That's it! :-) That's all the advice I have. Should you happen to get advance warning, have these three things on hand, and it'll be over soon enough. The physical part anyway... the emotional part can take a lot longer... but no matter what, remember, you are NOT alone!

99 comments:

  1. Update, on Wednesday night, I posted on my facebook that I was tired off smelling like something died. A few friends got really concerned and urged me to go in in case I was infected. I know the signs of infection, and honestly, I'm certain that this particular smell was not that of infection. It was more like rotting blood. My bleeding had slowed to the point that it was coming out brownish like old blood, so I figured that this smell was normal. Something HAD died after all... Anyway, I did an internet search for bad smell during miscarriage, and found out that lots of women report a smell like something died, and so long as there's no pain or fever, it can be normal. On Thursday morning, I passed another large chunk of placenta. Immediately, the smell decreased, and honestly the amount of blood decreased too. So I truly believe that the smell was simply from the last little bit that needed to come out. I still have no other signs of infection, but I am keeping a close eye on my body. It may feel like it's taking forever, but I can see the end in sight! :-)

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    1. I came here because I noticed a smell. It actually smells more like a really rotten egg, if you've ever smelled one of those, instead of something dead. Anyway I noticed a smell yesterday and then today at work I passed a large blood clot. It's been 17 days since I first started bleeding. I'm doing this naturally because my insurance doesn't cover anything pregnancy related. I'm glad You wrote this because it makes me feel A LOT better knowing that it's normal. So I hope that this was the last of it. When does the smell go away and how long before I stop bleeding now, in your opinion...

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    2. In my opinion, the uterus bleeds - like it does every month - as long as it needs to in order to clean everything out. The bits of flesh that formed when you were pregnant cling to the walls of the uterus and because they are dead, they start to smell. The longer they are in there, the worse they will smell. For me, the moment the last of it came out, the smell stopped and my bleeding was done the next day or two. It was also really light like at the end of my period. If you still have a smell, then there's probably more left in there, however, if the smell has now gone, then the end should be in sight. Keep an eye out for fever, aches, just generally feeling icky, and other signs of infection. The smell you describe makes me think that you might want to have it looked at. HOWEVER, if they even suspect that you have an infection, they'll throw antibiotics at you, which could make things worse in the long run. So you have to decide if this is something that you want to have a doctor look at, or if you just want to wait and see. If you think you might have an infection, you could always try taking raw garlic minced as small as you can get it. Take a spoonful of it and stick it in your mouth like a pill - or rather a bunch of tiny pills - then quickly chase with milk and swallow it all. Garlic is Mother Nature's most powerful antibiotic, but it doesn't kill the good bacteria along with the bad. Good luck :-)

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  2. Thank you. I am currently not undergoing a miscarriage but my friend is...was researching for her and came across your page. You have put our minds a little more at ease. Thanks again!

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    1. Thank you :-) I am glad to hear that your friend has your support. She's lucky to have you :-)

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  3. Hi my name is regina. I recently had a miscarriage at 14 weeks. I experienced the same things you spoke of. I just stopped bleeding three days ago. And i noticed a strong odor as welli made a follow up apointment to make sure i dont have any infections.its been six weeks.and i will be glad to see the light as you have. Most people dont understand the pain factor involved unless they experience it first hand. Thank you for sharing your story.

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  4. Thank you so much for sharing your story, it's of great comfort. I've been experiencing this for about 6 weeks & it's now just easing up, but thank God I finally feel like I'm not alone. That smell of the miscarriage is hard to stomach each time I need to change out & it's scary too because this is my first experience & most painful experience I have been through. I just had my last baby 9 months ago & was diagnosed as anemic & was still prescribed b-12 & iron pills. This miscarriage has drained me to my ultimate low, where my anemia has been at it's worst - I'm winded easily, drained, headaches, achy muscles/joints and always thirsty, not to mention, my appetite is so screwed up. I can't wait 'til this is all over. I just want to enjoy my family husband & children and not feel moody, grouchy or angry because of the pain I'm enduring or going through. I feel bad for my family that I'm not 100%. That's the most frustrating part, with the pain & always feeling drained. Again, thank you so much for sharing, it's comforting & I'm no longer afraid

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    1. Thank you for sharing your story! I am glad I could help provide comfort, and I sincerely hope that life has returned to normal for you :-)

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    2. thank you for sharing your story!

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  5. Thank you for your post.. I am literally going through everything you described & it is great, possibly "seeing" a silver lining! I actually was suprised because I thought after the first "chicken liver" passage It was over but hours later I am laying in dire pain! I was honestly thinking maybe the emotional part was going to be the hardest but wow has my thoughts changed! I have yet to actually go through the greiving part so as soon as the physical challenge is finished I will move forward! Again thank you for sharing your experience and my thoughts and prayers are with all of you mommies & daddies out there!

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  6. Thank you for your post. I have never had proof of ever being pregnant before. During this month, I threw up once and started gaining weight. I just thought it was stress. Around the time my period was suppose to start, my legs just started cramping and were in pain. I didn't actually start until three days later which is not normal for me since I am normally to the day. My legs were crampy and painful for six days straight. That was not normal. The normal cramps and flow started but after three days stopped for a day and then started again, let up for a couple of days and then started again. I am on day eight now and the flow has started again... The key thing that got me doing a search on the internet was the putrid smell. It is a very strong rotten corps stench that I have never had before. Apparently I am having a early miscarriage. At least now I have an explanation for a very weird period and my first proof ever of even being able to conceive.

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    1. Good luck in the future. Being regular is a good sign. When I was trying to conceive a long time ago, I was so irregular that I never knew if I was going to get a period or when. Hopefully when you want to conceive, it'll go well for you :-)

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  7. I just had a miscarriage starting to have weird odor and etc. since the bleeding will not stop. found out was pregnant the middle of May. plus, I did get pregnant have no idea when since I got my period with out knowing I am pregnant. then er said had a miscarriage and dr. saying I am pregnant still. Turns out I had a threatened miscarriage. some reason now I see like blood cuts like my period but don't know if all the tissue and everything is gone from the miscarriage. then the smell annoys me too. :) I had a miscarriage before and it went fast no problems but this one seems like having problems and bleeding. So I am worried what should I do? Thanks for your stories and sorry for everyone loss too. :(

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    1. I hope it works out for you soon. In your case I would ask a doctor, because it's entirely possible that you do have some decaying tissue from your miscarriage even though - if I am reading you correctly - you are already pregnant again. That could be a problem that needs to be seen by an experienced obgyn.

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    2. strange part was the report of the er. Saying my ovaries measures 4.1 x 4.1 x 4.6 cm and contains a simple cyst was about 3.7 x 3.6 x 3.1 cm. The Nurse assistant said it is normal. don't think it normal to bleed since I found out I was pregnant and miscarriage since my 1st obgyn appointment on June 5,2013 during my miscarriage. They schedule me on Monday at 3pm. don't know if I can last till then hate seeing blood for like a month in half. told them each time I had to get the blood report paper since they don't draw blood them self. which is weird since they our next to the hospital.thanks again for responding back to me.

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  8. I recently found out that I had a miscarriage. I started bleeding on the tuesday and tuesday night I was suffering excruciating period cramps. I lost two large clots and the pain went almost straight away. I haven't had barely any pain since them but just a very strong smell. A strong menstrual smell. I wanted to know if this was normal. I wasn't even 5 weeks pregnant but I'm only 20 and not sure what to expect.

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    1. Sorry I couldn't reply sooner, but I had an internet outage for the last week due to a bad storm. Do you still have the strong smell? It sounds normal to me, but if you still have it a week later, I would have it checked out.

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  9. I have a quick question... this is my first miscarriage I already have a little two year old girl. But I had no idea I was pregnant. I had my period every month on time and had many painful cramps in my ovaries before. I went to the doctor to see what was going on figured it was another cyst on my ovarie only to find out I'm pregnant. I told her impossible bc I was still bleeding from my period. Well that did an ultra sound that day and the baby was still in there. But I have that decaying smell coming from me. I would just like to know if your supposed to get the smell before or after the baby is compeletly gone.

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    1. The smell comes when there is still tissue inside you that needs to come out. In my experience, it stopped once the last bit of tissue had finally come out. It gets worse as time passes, but it should finally come out on it owns. If it's taking too long or it starts to smell worse than you can handle - or if you get a fever and other symptoms of an infection, go in to the doctor. If all you have is a smell and the miscarriage is progressing, I would personally wait and see. Good luck!

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  10. Thank you for being so frank! I'm sure this has helped and encouraged countless women.

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  11. OMG!!!!!! thank you all for your comments and post. last monday on september 5th i was having real bad stomach pains, i went to use the restroom thinking i just had to do the number 2, i did and with that came allot of blood large blood clots started to droop out of me, i was scared so i called my friend to come get me to take me to the ER, the bleeding got very bad while waiting on my friend i had to change clothes twice, when he finally came i was changing again all with in 20 min a larger piece of tissue dropped out of me that really scared me, so quickly we went to the ER i was waiting almost 3 hours in pain until i was finally helped my sugar was very low so the doctor gave e a soda to get it back right, they had a hard time finding my veins in my arms, the doctors gave me 2 pregnancy test them finally gave me a vaginal ultrsound, during the ultra sound they stuck a long camera into me during that more blood and clots dropped out of me she too a million pics after that was done the doctor told me i had a miscarriage my main concern was that all of the baby was out of me, he the told me that i had already gotten most of the baby out of me and that the rest would just come out, i asked pain medicine he said he didn't prescribe it, i left the hospital at 5am that morning hours layer i was in the worst pain ever for like 6 days!! seemed like i was going to die the worst pain i have ever had.that was almost two weeks ago the blood has slowed down and is now brown and sometimes it will look light red, for the past two days i have a the worst smell ever i can smell it through my clothes and it docent even have to be allot of blood, my question is how long will this last? im only 23 this was my first pregnancy

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    1. I'm sorry your doctor wouldn't prescribe you a pain killer. Next time try telling him that the pain is so bad that you feel like you are dying. Maybe then he will not be so heartless. In any case, it sounds like you are almost done. I would guess that you only have one stubborn chunk left inside you that needs to come out, and when it does, you'll be done. Just keep an eye out for a fever, aches, chills, and any other sign of infection.
      I feel bad that your first experience with pregnancy was so bad, but hopefully your next one - when you are ready for it - will be beautiful :-)
      Good Luck!

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  12. Why don't doctors listen to us when we say how bad the pain is? I had a missed miscarriage a few years ago and after waiting to lose the foetus naturally (which didn't happen) I agreed to take the tablets to induce the mc. I was supposed to take two tablets then go to hospital two days later to have the mc, about as painful as a period is how they described it.
    In my case the tablets brought on the mc before I was readmitted. I have now had two healthy babies and can honestly say it hurt as much as the later stages of their labours.
    Yet when I phoned the hospital they didn't want to admit me if the pain was bearable! I tried to explain between contractions how bad it was but it wasn't until I had one so bad that I literally screamed down the phone then apologised for being unable to control my pain that he relented and agreed I should come over to be admitted.
    I was well treated there and got an apology afterwards for not being warned this happens in 10% of cases.
    I think this post is doing a great service in helping support women at an horrendous time of their lives. Well done you fror sharing. xxx

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  13. Thank you for sharing your story. i did not have a comfirmed miscarriage. but after reading all the posts here. i feel certain i did. i have not shared this with any one. i just needed to deal with it in my own way and time.

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  14. I wasn't planning on getting pregnant but it happened and I was so excited. My hormones were raging at 53, 000 and its like my body hit puberty, especially my face! I was lucky enough to nerver really experience acne back in my high school years but once I got pregnant-game over! I believe I was 9-12 weeks along when I found out, but my doctor informed me I was having a missed miscarriage since the baby was at 6-9 weeks. Once it was confirmed the baby wasn't alive I was heart broken, my body finally accepted the truth. On September 1st I started bleeding. The worst cramps of my life!!!! I was unable to call anyone or rush myself to the hospital because I was all by myself in an area I'm unfamiliar with. I was house/dog sitting for my parents while they were out of state to see my younger brother graduate from boot camp. I was so scared by myself! My lower front and back hurt like crazy! I was screaming bloody murder. A couple days later the pain went away. Since then I've been bleeding for 2 months now and I'm tired of waiting for it to end! Is it supposed to last this long? Occasionally I get some cramps here and there. I have an extreme bad odor that smells like rotting blood. Its not an infection. My doctor recommended to wash with vinegar and water and it would help but not to douche. I've done it 2x now but I'm nervous that its the same exact thing. Maybe I'm doing it wrong? This scent has been unbearable though! And my jobs require me to be in diverse outfits that give the smell an opportunity to travel far. I'm not bleeding like crazy but I go through at least a pad a day, sometimes 2. Is this normal? Has any experienced the same thing?

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    1. In response to anonymous above on November 6th:
      I just commented below yours (cate), and I started reading after I commented about my personal situation.
      Hunny... I am so sorry you are going through this. Esp. being that it was your first pregnancy.. If I were you, I would call your doctor tomorrow. If it has been going on that long, something might be wrong. It could possibly be infection. I have been having issues for only about a week and I am doing the same thing tomorrow.. I don't want you to worry, but if it has been 2 months since it started, you may need to go in. Or have you been achy or feverish?
      Have you have any major tissue pass yet? For example.. Have you felt anything come out? Maybe this is TMI, but this past Sunday I know I passed the "fetus".. I called my Dr Monday morning, and she confirmed that's what it was. It looked like a small human heart. And I also passed something else right before that. Maybe the placenta. Have you experienced anything like that?

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  15. I found this page as everyone else did. I was right at 8 weeks when I went to the ER. I started bleeding very heavy, and thought surely, I was having a miscarriage. They did a sonogram n there was no heartbeat. Sent me home with a RX for painkillers (which I never filled, aleve worked well for me), and I'm 99% sure I passed the majority of the tissue Sunday night. I am still having an odor, but no where near what it was. I'm debating making an appt tomorrow (Thursday), but I have no insurance. I can't afford the ER visit I already had, most less an office visit. I'm worried that if I don't go in, it will effect my fertility in the future..? Right now, I'm just keeping an eye on everything, but is it over? Or since all of you ladies had such horrible pain... Is there more to come?

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  16. I just had a miscarriage Oct 29, 2013. I am also going through an ectopic pregnancy on top of my miscarriage. Now, I'm having a really bad odor when I urinate. The bleeding has stopped. My doctors say that I have no infection. So, is the odor normal? They told me that I have nothing to worry about. I'm just concerned that they may be wrong. I don't trust doctors? My miscarriage started Oct 28, 2013 at 4pm. I finally passed placental matter about midnight. Went to the ER at 1 am and was finally seen at 3am. They had me stay overnight and I was released at 10am on Oct 29 13. The pain was excruciating, and now I'm just worried about the Ectopic Pregnancy. Any information would be appreciated. I'm 21 also.

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  17. At Anonymous, Cate, and Athena. As far as I know, the placenta that forms once you are pregnant grows until it is thick and solid. If giving birth naturally, it comes out in one large ball after the baby is out, but when a woman miscarries before the second or third trimester, the placenta simply breaks up into smaller chunks, and each chunk passes as it comes unstuck from the wall of the uterus. Sometimes the last chunk can take quite a long time to pass, and so long as it is in there, it will smell like something died. You can have the doctors go in there and scrape it out, but if you cannot afford that, or simply don't like doctors, you can simply wait. I don't know how long it can take, but I do know that it can take a while. I personally would try taking herbs to tone the uterus - such as raspberry leaf. Traditional Medicinals has a PMS tea that I hear works wonders. If there is any other sign of infection, it's best to go in and have it checked out, but if all you have is a smell, simply keeping an eye on your body will help. I know that it is scary, and that you are probably hyper aware of every little thing that happens to your body right now, and I wish I could be there to hold your hand.
    Athena, as for the ectopic pregnancy, that is different altogether, and I am sorry, but to my knowledge, they are going to have to go in there sooner or later to remove it. Sooner rather than later as it can cause quite a bit of damage to your Fallopian tubes. I pray that there is another solution for you!
    At Cate specifically, I thought I had passed everything with little to no pain and then a couple of days later, the miscarriage started for real. That may be what is happening to you, or maybe you have a higher tolerance for pain. If I were you, I would personally wait it out, but if you feel better going in, then that is what you should do. Good luck!
    My sympathies to everyone who has commented and I haven't responded. I know how hard this is :-(

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  18. Thank you for responding. I have commented on multiple sites, and just about everyone was either rude because I "commented in the wrong place", or just completely ignored me .. Lol. So really.. Thank you! :)
    I think that everything has passed naturally for me. Before I came to your page, I had convinced myself that I needed to go to the doctor. The odor is gone (thank goodness), and the bleeding has stopped.
    Thank you for your knowledge and support!
    & to the girls still going through this.. Hang in there.. The end is near. :)

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  19. Thank you for your post! Im 25 and this is my second miscarriage in 5 months. Thebfirst wasnt too painful, but this one, whocj started 4-5 days ago, has been very painful.

    Heating pads are amazing!!!!! The smell as well, i hate it, i cant wait until its completely over so it goes away.

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  20. I am so glad I found this site! I'm 24 years old & had my first pregnancy/miscarriage. We were trying to conceive a year after our wedding, So when I missed my period we were super excited. Everything was going great until my 2nd prenatal visit. I was measuring at 9 weeks & they could not find a heartbeat. We tried to look again 4 days later & still no heartbeat. My doctor told me what to prepare for & said I would start bleeding in a couple weeks. I wanted to pass it on its own at home, but then Thanksgiving was approaching. So the week of (November 25th 2013), I decided to insert those pills you take to get contractions going to make everything come out. I was scared about the pain. So a few hours later I passed the sac & had a lot of bleeding but then it slowed down majorly after passing tissue & the sac. A week later I had an exam with the doctor & she told me everything looked good & my cervix was now closed. She told me she was going to monitor my blood work to make sure my HCG was dropping. It went from 250,000 to 46,000 in two weeks. Christmas came along & I started to have bad cramps. I called the doctor & she told me it was normal & to just take the leftover pain medication from the miscarriage. So that's what I did... for a week. Then on Sunday December,29th 2013 I ended up in the ER. That morning I stood up blood literally poured out of me & I passed 3 large pieces of tissue. I was in such unbearable pain that I could not get off the floor. My husband rushed me to the hospital & they determined that the lining of my uterus looked "abnormal" & my HCG levels were at 3,000. They told me to see my OB the next day, so I did. They did another exam on me & pulled/scrapped a lot more tissue out of me. I was crying on the table... I couldn't help but be angry that this was still happening after a month later & them telling me everything was fine. I thought it was finally over! So the doctor put me on MORE medication to start contractions again. I took it every 4 hours for 3 days... & that was 3 days of hell. I went in on Thursday to get more blood work done & go in again Monday to review it & have yet another wonderful exam. But I noticed also, two nights ago having a bad odor. It smells like death!! Everyone has been telling me to call the doctor if I get a fever or if I'm having any pain. No fever, but I'm sore... when I sit too quickly it's very sore. Maybe that's my cervix closing again? I have some random sharp cramps at times, but I noticed if I have gas it makes it worse, once the gas is gone those sharp cramps are gone. I guess I am just looking for some advice. I feel like this holiday season has been a disaster dealing with all of this & once I think its over, I am dealing with it all over again. Very frustrating & sad. If anyone has tips on how to get rid of this smell, that would be great!

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    1. In my experience, the smell like something died means that there is still tissue in there that needs to come out. After reading about everything you have been through, I personally would go back into the doctor to make absolute sure that nothing is wrong. Also in my experience, as soon as the tissue comes out, the smell will stop and it will be over. The pains sound like your body trying to expel the last little bit of tissue, and at this point, it's probably not much at all left in there. I completely understand how frustrating this is for you. I am currently miscarrying a second child, and I'm still waiting for the whole thing to start. My HGC levels have dropped down to around 8000, but aside from a little brown spotting, I haven't actually started the process of eliminating the tissue. It's been over a month, so I'm starting to wish it would just happen already! I pray that your body finishes this process as soon as possible, but seriously, I'd go back into the doctor if I was you, unless you are pretty sure that it's almost over and just want to wait it out. Listen to your body and your instincts and you'll know the right thing to do. Good luck!

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    2. So today at the doctors, they told me that my levels went from 3,000 on Sunday & when I had labs drawn again on Thursday they were 2,172. I have passed a lot more since then & the smell I had asked about earlier is gone. That night I passed a piece of tissue & the smell literally was completely gone after that & I haven't passed anything since! They drew my blood again today & told me the results should be back by tomorrow or Wednesday & also, they are putting me on antibiotics just to make sure I don't get an infection, but not to worry because I don't have one. They didn't even examine me today.... also, after I had left the office, they called me & asked me if I could have a D&C tomorrow morning!! I was blown away! I'm going back to work tomorrow & I don't have $2,500 to pay for a procedure like that right now. I'm really starting to lose hope in this doctor.... it makes me feel like they aren't sure what they want to do. If my body is passing everything the way it should, why do more damage & get a D&C done? She also told me that sometimes during a D&C, they might make a hole in the uterus from all the scrapping they do but not to worry because it is a muscle & will just grow back over.... I asked them what the consequences are if I don't get the D&C, they told me I would be at a risk for infection & may have bleeding for a few more days. Am I the only one that thinks they way they handle things is a little off?!

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    3. I totally feel for you, and here is my opinion, but please keep in mind that I am NOT a trained medical professional. Take what I say with a grain of salt, but don't take the antibiotics unless you have reason to suspect that you are getting an infection. Don't get the D&C because the ONLY reason they want to give it to you is to prevent an infection that they already gave you antibiotics for. The smell is gone, and I bet your bleeding has lessened quite a bit. To me, it sounds like you are finally seeing the end. I would just let my body finish the little bit of bleeding it has left, and keep an eye out for infection, but, if you haven't gotten one in all this time, I think it's safe to say that you probably won't get one now that you're almost done. In my opinion, the doctors are only trying to cover their butts. They don't want you to - now that you know that they don't really know what to do with you - they don't want you to sue them for malpractice, so they want to do everything they can to make it look like they are doing everything possible for you so that you can't sue them for malpractice. That doesn't mean that they have YOUR best interests in mind, it just means that they have to make sure they are not liable for anything that happens to you. By all means, if you have any reason to suspect that something might be wrong, go back in and get checked out, but right now, everything sounds like it is going well and you do not need to talk to your doctor again. Good luck and I am glad that this is finally almost over for you.

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    4. I told them I wasn't doing the D&C. They said they would call me back to see what the doctor recommends I do.. never got a call back. Although, the nurse called me today to tell me my lab results from yesterday came back & my levels went from 2172 to 622 in 3 days!!! I was so happy when they told me that. The end finally seems near! I'm still passing some small blood clots but the bleeding has subsided greatly to almost nothing. I'm just having the clots (when I urinate mainly). She also told me i am super anemic & that I need to take two iron pills a day & get my blood work done again on this coming Monday. My heart seriously goes out to anyone dealing with this. It has been absolute misery for us.I really am so glad I found this blog & got some relief to the questions I had floating around in my head. It has made me feel a lot better being able to talk to other women about this. My husband tells me that we can try again as soon as I say so, but I think I may just give my body a couple month break so I can heal from all of this. I am also petrified of it happening again...

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    5. As you are healing - emotionally - from this trauma, look into the recommended diet for pregnant and nursing mothers. In traditional societies, both partners would be put on a special diet for months before trying to conceive so that they had all the necessary building blocks to make sure they had a healthy child. It might help when you do get pregnant again so that you don't miscarry. Here's a link: http://www.westonaprice.org/childrens-health/diet-for-pregnant-and-nursing-mothers

      I know that the diet might be shocking at first, but really look into it and think about it, and if you have any questions, there's a group that you can go to to ask your questions. The ladies there are SUPER knowledgeable :-)
      http://groups.yahoo.com/neo/groups/newwaphb/info

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  21. Ugh.. wow, I am so sorry that you are going through this again. I could not even imagine going through something so heartbreaking again. I think the time you have to wait is one of the hardest things to deal with, other than the fact of losing something you fell in love with so much that words cannot describe. I hope you start the process soon & I also hope you have a fast recovery with no lingering problems. My prayers are with you & your family! Thank you so much for the advice & very caring words. Hopefully the remaining tissue will pass soon! I have an appointment first thing tomorrow morning, so I will probably get on here tomorrow to give the outcome from all of this & hopefully have some decent news.

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  22. I had a miscarriage last week 12/31/13 I was one day shy of being 11 weeks along. We were so happy when we found out we were expecting because I waited 8 long years to get pregnant with my two year old. My bleeding started on Thanksgiving day and at my first prenatal appointment the Dr wasn't concerned at all but had me do an ultrasound on 12/19 baby looked great and heart beat was strong Iwas so hhappy to hear the news. But on 12/30/13 I was at work and started bleeding more so I went to the er only to find out that my little ones heart had stopped beating that day. On 12/31/13 I had lots of pain bleeding clothing and even passed my little one as I could see everything. The pain was very bad but I must say the emotional part is what's really killing me. I'm still bleeding a week later and have a Dr appointment Thursday I no longer have an oder so I'm hopeful this is almost over. I really want to heal and try again as soon as my body is ready.

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    1. Good luck! I sympathize with the emotions, and know how they can hurt more than the physical pain. Hopefully, the next time will go a lot better! If - like me - you have diabetes or another condition that needs to be managed - getting help for the condition the moment you find out you are pregnant again can help. For me, I was told this time that because my blood sugar is running so high (I have been controlling it with diet, but no meds, and for some reason, the diet has stopped working in the last two years, so my sugars are really high) well, that the blood sugar is basically choking my baby. That means that if I ever get pregnant again, I will immediately go in to the doctor to get on insulin to control my blood sugar so that it doesn't harm the baby. In this day and age, almost everyone has something - such as gluten sensitivity - that can play a factor in miscarriage. It sounds like you said that you have trouble conceiving, so definitely look into reasons why your body is having trouble. Have the doctor do extensive bloodwork until they find the underlying problem. Correcting it will go a long way to helping you conceive and not miscarry, and it could be a random allergy - such as corn or soy or dairy - that you don't realize you have. Again good luck! I'll pray for your success :-)

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  23. Hi ladies, so happy I found this site.. I believe I suffered a miscarriage in Dec. I missed my menstrual the month of Nov., I usually get it at the end of each month. So before that I had a period Oct. 20th which lasted for a week, then nothing for the month of Nov... Dec. 1st I had what seem to be a normal menstrual in the beginning I started passing clots (I've always had clots with my periods), this period lasted around five days, I'd say around the fourth day I woke up to cramps and this gushing like fluid coming out on me, it was almost like water mixed with blood I rushed to the bathroom and passed clot, I didn't think anything of it until later. My husband and I had intercourse two days after my period, about two days later on the 10th of Dec. I started to bleed again medium to light with very small specks of clots, with a really bad odor. I'm still bleeding light, it's not brown it's red. I was wondering has anyone experienced this?? And also I've suffered a miscarriage in 2003 at 8 weeks, it's one of worst feelings I've experienced, body, mind and soul..

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    1. I'm so sorry I didn't reply sooner! I'm dealing with a miscarriage myself right now, and spent most of the day in bed. I'm going to say that it sounds a lot like a miscarriage to me. The water mixed with blood fluid is exactly what it looked like when my water broke, and the smell like something died indicates that there is tissue in there that still needs to come out. Not to mention the continued red blood. This will continue - with random and possibly sharp pain - as contractions try to push out everything left in your uterus that needs to come out. If you have any indication that you might have an infection - such as fever and or chills - then go in and get checked out. If you feel more or less fine, then just keep an eye on it. It can take a LONG time, but it sounds like you might be reaching the end. Good luck and I hope this goes quickly for you.

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    2. No it's ok, Aww I'm so sorry you're going through this again. As for me I'm still bleeding, no fever or chills, few contractions here and there, although I did pass another clot a few days ago, but still light bleeding off and on. It's been a little over a month now, I'm just ready for it to stop.. I also pray that you're doing okay..

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  24. when i miscarried at 3 months it looked like tons of chicken livers came out of me, i needed a d& c to get the rest out tho. when i miscarried at 6 weeks it started as 3 weeks of spotting then really heavy period with big clots and a foul odor like dirty butt and rotten fish. it seems to have all come out on its own this time tho

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  25. Good evening everyone.
    This posts are so enlightening.
    My last period had a smell like rotten raw meat or like raw meat that's beginning to go bad.
    It lasted a little bit longer than usual. My period is usually 3-4days but this time lasted about 5 days. I'm married (2 months in marriage) and have never been pregnant. I had little bearable pains on the first day of my menses but the remaining days were pain free. The smell continued all through my menstrual period till my period ended. I'm not sure what this means. I'm so scared to even go to a doctor.
    My period was delayed about 5days before it finally came. What could this mean? I'm worried.

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    1. It sounds to me like a very early miscarriage. Unless you think something might be wrong - though it sounds like everything is fine - I don't see any reason to go to the doctor. HOWEVER, going in might be a good idea so that they can do tests to see if there's a reason you miscarried. If all tests come back normal, then it was just that something went wrong, but if the tests come back abnormal and you want to have a baby, it's better to know that now so that you can deal with any issues and ensure a successful pregnancy in the future. Either way, good luck! I know it can be scary, but the best way to not be scared is to arm yourself with knowledge :-)

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  26. I see.
    Thanks for your advice.
    I love ur blog... Doing a great job.

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  27. Thank you for posting this. This post helps me get through it.
    Although this is my 3rd miscarriage, previous 2 was done by d&c and was dupe by the doctor that natural miscarriage is dangerous!! Since I have changed doctor, I opt for natural miscarriage as I am so afraid to go through the surgery again with anaesthetic. The feeling of passing out really scares me off.
    I was told at wk 6 that there were no heartbeats, same like the previous 2. I was on Progestrone and Aspirin this time hoping that this pregnancy will do well. And yet doctor still prescribe me Progestrone and Aspirin for another 2 weeks hoping that this is a false alarm. But Wk 10 still no progress, I was really heartbroken. All pregnant symptoms went away at around wk 7 and I already knew there is no hope on this one. But I was still on the Progestrone and Aspirin left over that I kept on taking till wk 10. At wk 10, The scan has shown that the sac looked distorted instead of a round shape. Doctor said I have to stop taking any Progestrone which kept holding the pregnancy and aspirin which can cause severe bleeding!
    Anyway, the brown bleeding started on Friday night wk 11 on April 4th and have NO IDEA what to expect from this. My cousin who also had 3 miscarriages told me it will be a heavily painful period unlike the normal monthly ones. She had 8 days brown and 8 days red, 16 days altogether. The first 2 days started with horrible pain that even 2 tablets of Panadol every 4 hours does not help. The pain killer only took away I guess 50% of the pain, and I still felt the horrible pain. As I have not delivered my 1st baby vaginally but caesarean, I have no idea how natural birth does feels like. I have to sleep through the 2 days and it gradually stops. I am guessing that the cervix is opening?? But 2 days was unbearable. Every time there were passing of placenta, my kidneys felt super sore I could hardly stand, and huge ( I mean really huge) amount of blood will pass through before the placenta came out. Last week was the worse, I nearly black out due to huge amount of blood lost.
    Oh my cousin didn’t mention the dreaded rotten smell!! Today is Day 19 I am still bleeding and I smell like walking dead corpse!! The smell was so unbearable; I have to change every 1-2 hours. Yesterday I was in a hurry and busy and wear the same menstrual pad for 6 hours since the brown bleeding was minimal. By the time I got home, the stench was so terrible I can smell through my cloths and my hair! I kept tempted to use back my menstrual cup and cloth pad, but the cloth pad stained so black it was too difficult to wash. Every time I have tempted to use back my menstrual cup so that I wouldn’t smell like dead corpse, I kept reading back your post and searching through the net. It was probably I hold on the pregnancy for far too long (additional 5 weeks).
    Lesson learned till now:
    1. Stop progesterone and aspirin once you have heard the bad news.
    2. Stock up on your menstrual pads, I’m an environment friendly person but I just can’t get the black stain off my cloth pads. Also throw out your garbage EVERY NIGHT. My room now smells like mortuary.
    3. I am now on Vitamin B complex to promote red blood cell growth so that I wouldn’t pass out next time of huge blood lost.
    This is my story, Hope this helps others.

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    1. Do you think I should do dnc? Day 19 with that stench is unbearable.

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    2. I'm sorry I didn't get back to you sooner, but I was offline due to computer troubles. I'm sure you have made a decision by now, and maybe the blood has stopped. My heart goes out to you because I know how painful and hard this can be. I pray that your miscarriage ends soon, and if it doesn't see a doctor. Though if the recommend a D+C at this point, I would distrust them. Your body has already gotten rid of most of it and there's only a little left. Probably just one chunk of placenta. Scraping the wall of your uterus for just one chunk seems excessive and unnecessary to me. You know your body best, if anything seems wrong, it's better to go in and be seen. Especially if you start running a fever. However, if you don't think that anything is wrong, then you can simply let your body finish. It may seem like forever, but it will be over eventually. Good luck and I'm praying for you!

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  28. Hi, my baby, that would have been my 4th, due 10-18-2014, died at 11 weeks. That was 4 weeks ago & I am still going through this mc. After 2 weeks, I was in such bad pain that I stayed on the couch for 3 days & then passed a bunch of huge blood clots. Then I felt better for a few days but still had a thick brownish red discharge with a really bad odor (thankfully no fever). I feel like I am having little contractions so hopefully I will pass the rest of it soon. Thanks so much for this site! When I first noticed the odor I thought I might have a serious infection so it was comforting to hear that this is pretty normal. It is frustrating that this is taking sooo long, but I want to avoid the damage that a D&C can cause since I want to try for another baby sometime soon. I was really hoping to see the baby, but I'm not sure that will happen at this point. Something else happened that nobody told me about- my milk started coming in! That made me really sad when I saw a wet spot on my shirt since I am a huge advocate of breastfeeding & my breasts ache. I'm so sorry to all of you that are having or have had a mc. My friends just keep saying that they don't know what to say. My niece has the same due date as me, so it will be hard to see her baby & realize what I'm missing. I think this will be a long journey.

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  29. I want to thank you for this. Reading everything made me feel a bit better. I believe I have miscarried but haven't had it confirmed yet. This will be my second mc back to back. Its been really odd though. I found out I was pregnant on on april 3rd. Was supposedly about 4 wks alonf. And a couple days later I bled a very small clot and than had brownish discharge for the next day. And than it stopped. A bit over a week later I spotted pink for about 15 minutes and than had brown dc for about a day. And than it stopped again. Ot happened again a little over a week after that. Spotting for ten minutes, brown dc for a day and than stopping. Last thursday I bled really heavily for about 5 minutes and passed something the length of a finger and fairly thick. I assume it was tissue. Looked like liver. And than it stopped again. Had the brown dc for a day or so. Here I am 3 days later not bleeding. I am assuming I mc but why would it keep stopping like this >. < no pain with any of my bleeding or in my pregnancy at all. I have an odor but its not like rotted meat. Maybe blood? My insurance finally was approved so I can make an appt but I was wondering if this stop go approach at mc is normal. It's been frustrating and heartbreaking

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    1. Juli, as I understand it, the stopping and starting is your body preparing to miscarry. It's a lot like the braxton hicks contractions that a lot of women feel weeks before they go into labor. It's practice and also the body's way of doing as much work as possible before it goes through the painful process of labor. I sympathize and know how frustrating it is. However, I'd say that you are probably not done yet. Hopefully your doctor or a nurse can help you figure out what is going on, but keep in mind that a miscarriage can take a long time. My second miscarriage, the baby stopped growing at 7 weeks gestation, but I was over 12 weeks along when my body finally started the process. Hopefully, now that you've passed some tissue, your body will finish quickly. Prayers.

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    2. Thank you so much for the info. This is my second mc but I had to d&c the first because it refused to come out. So I'm not experienced with this. Tge doctor drew blood yesterday to find out hormone level but I'm sure this one isn't viable. Here's hoping my next one is successful. My husband is taking it harder than I am.

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    3. I debated over posting this or not. I decided to just in case it could help encourage someone. I had an ultra sound yesterday. I went in and expected them to tell me it wasn't viable. As soon as the wand was in though they found the baby with a normal heartbeat and normal length. I asked what I could of passed And they couldn't tell me so I have no idea. But I went in knowing my baby was dead and it turned out to be perfectly normal. I'm still a little worried about the bleeding but for now everything is fine. I hope this will encourage anyone who has a similar story to mine. Things are not always as they seem. I prayed the night before that my Goddess would give me strength to hear the bad news. I bet she was laughing at me for worrying so much. Heres hoping that everything continues to be fine and to all of you going through a miscarriage. Have faith in your higher power whatever it might be. My love to all of you.

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    4. Juli, thank you for replying because as I read your original post, I kept thinking to myself that you were just spotting but still had a viable baby. Of course, I couldn't say that because if I was wrong, I would come of as cruel and perverse. To be honest, my intuition is spotty, so I had a pretty good chance of being wrong, therefore I am happy that you came back and reported the happy news :-)
      Good luck!

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    5. You have been a true source of comfort for me and I truly appreciate it. My intuition is spotty as well lol. Thank you for being am encouragement to all of us.

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  30. To Juli, I'm sorry to hear about what your going through! I wrote about my baby that was due 10-18-2014. I can't tell you if this is normal or not, but my bleeding & discharge stopped for a whole week & then came back even heavier. I have a very strong odor which is almost always a sure sign of a mc. Make sure you see someone right away if you get a fever! Fever can be a sign of infection. The mc might be over if you have stopped bleeding. But I'm wishing you the best & if it was a mc then I wish you fast healing. You are not alone!

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    1. Thank you for the advice and your kind words. I am sorry for your loss as well. Thankfully I am not feverish but I have been really bloaty. I am just ready to be done. Fast healing to you as well.

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  31. It has been a week since I had my mc and I thought it was over until yesterday morning I woke up cramping like hell. I went to the restroom and had a foul odor like something is dead and I still have it today. I'm just wondering how long will this last. So glad to know I'm not the only one. I don't have any signs of fever, so that's good, but this smell is revolting.

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    1. It can take a long time, however, if you thought you were done but now have a smell, that tells me that you still have some tissue in there. Until it passes, you'll have that smell and possibly some intermittent bleeding. Good luck! I hope that your miscarriage finishes as quickly as possible.

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    2. Thank you Roxy

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  32. I should be 11 and a half weeks pregnant but I'm not.
    I'm kind of lost at the moment, went to hospital on Saturday with high fever they gave me antibiotics and said I had a kidney infection, woke up Tuesday morning with spotting went back to hospital to have them do tests, had one normal ultrasound and 2 internal ultrasounds. They found an empty sac in my uterus and an unknown growth on my ovary possible cyst or ovarian ectopic pregnancy.
    Was discharged and was home for 5hrs before blood clots and heavier bleeding started. Had one huge clot ( about 5-6cm) Called the hospital told me I could come in or I can stay at home. Opted to stay at home.
    All I can smell is metallic blood, my fiancé doesn't smell anything so I don't know if it's my head playing tricks on me. I don't know what to do. I know there's no pregnancy, though my fiancé assured me we can keep trying once I feel up for it.
    I'm getting married in 4weeks and I just wanted to know if the bleeding would have stopped by then.
    I don't want this to be on my mind every minute of every day.

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    1. I would say that in four weeks, you *should* be done. The length of time it can take will vary based on your body. You will bleed a lot, and you will get thoroughly sick of smelling like something died, but it WILL eventually end! Your body can do this. Try to relax and let it. Warning, you probably will go through a mini labor at some point where you feel regular contractions and pain, but so long as you do not have fever or a fishy/yeasty smell, you should be fine. Have a heating pad and serious pain killers on hand for if this happens. If you have any doubts at any time, call the nurse hotline or go back into the doctor, but there's really not much they can do unless you want them to scrape out your uterus. The up side to that is that the whole process is over in a day or so. The down side is that it can cause infections AND if not careful, it could potentially injure your uterus. I myself am anti doctor, so I chose to just wait it out, but if you feel that the process is taking too long with your wedding coming up, you might want to reconsider. GOOD LUCK! And congratulations on getting married :-)

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  33. Thanks for the article, really eased my min, I just recently miscarried abt a week ago and am beginning to experience the smell, so hopefully this passes quickly enough. medications, except for plain old ibuprofen.. Now for the bleeding to end.. Thanks again.

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  34. Je suis une femme sans enfant depuis que je suis marié plus de 9 , ans se terminant l'année dernière , mon mari m'a dit qu'il voulait me divorcer qu'il a besoin d'un enfant d'une autre femme qu'il ne peut plus garder mon mariage , ma vie était misérable quand je devais tel commentaire de lui et je porte toutes les douleurs en moi parce qu'aucun homme ne pourra jamais tenir une telle patience tout ce que je pourrais faire est de lui plaire à tenir sa colère qu'un jour mes prières seront réponse . Je l'ai pleuré toute en moi mes amis ne m'a conseillé de pleurer ne va pas résoudre mon problème . Décembre 2013 20'th je me suis rendu à la maison pour Noël , après avoir passé 2 semaines je voulais dire un vieil ami qui demandent de mes enfants , et je leur ai expliqué ma situation à elle, elle a été choquée et surprise, dit pour de bon 9 , ans dans le mariage Je ne enfant , immédiatement elle me prend pour un homme du nom de Dr diamant lorsque la volonté y est arrivé ! L'homme me regarda et sourit , je voulais expliquer mon problème à lui, il m'a dit d'arrêter ! qu'il sait déjà ce qui me porter à son temple est tout au sujet de l'enfant , je l'ai dit oui . Plus tard, il m'a donné quelques herbes et l'huile avec des instructions . Lors de l'obtention de ma maison mari je les herbes pour 1 , la semaine , l'autre semaine je raté mon mensuel syn et je dis à mon mari, il ne répond pas à moi, parce qu'il pensait que je mentais et je lui ai dit que cela est grave et il prend moi à l'hôpital et a confirmé mon conçu mon mari était très heureux après 1 mois je l'appelle le Dr diamant et lui dit que je suis enceinte, il a dit oui , il savait déjà , que je vais livrer jumeaux , le moment venu et je dit à mon mari ce que le Dr dit qu'il y avait assez de sourire sur le 18'th Septembre 2014 ma livraison a été un succès avec des jumeaux garçons de mon mari était très heureux d'avoir tellement apprécie le Dr diamant dans ma vie . Je tordais cet e-mail à sans enfant , afin que vous aussi trouvé de l'aide à partir de lui . diamondtemple@hotmail.com

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  35. Thank you for your intuitive indepth amount of information, it truly helped me understand and expect exactly what was in store for me as i lost the baby. Thank you for being so open and honest as most of the things we go through as woman in these and many other circumstances is hard and albeit yucky to confess to anyone but our inner selves. Truly thank you, you are great :D

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  36. Hi, I was wondering if any of you know what the reason could be for my problem(hate goin to the doc.). First off I was 2 1/2 wks late for my period. It usually lasts for about 5 days tops. But I am still on it now and its been 7 days of nonstop heavy bleeding with a bunh of large blood clots. Ive never experienced my periods like this ever. Im also having a pain on my left side of my stomach. If any of you have been through this or have even the slightest idea what is wrong, please let me know, it would be greatly appriciated. Thank you

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    1. That sounds like a miscarriage to me, however, the pain in the stomach tells me that you might be having an infection or other complication that should be seen by a doctor. I understand not wanting to go see a doctor if you don't have to, but if you have an infection, you could get really sick or even die if it's not treated. In this case, it really is better to be seen.

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    2. Thank you so much for your response. I know your right about going to the doctor, I guess Ill just have to deal with it(better safe than sorry right) Thanks again for replying back to me.

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  37. Roxanne, what a wonderful, helpful site you have formed here > blessings to you for bringing the kind words you write back to the many woman who feel like they are going through this alone > much comfort i see is brought here with your reply's to their comments seeking advise.
    I am 51 years old and have experienced several miscarriages before conceiving my first child 28 years ago, the miscarriages where due to my blood type, once this was rectified as the problem it was discovered that i needed an injection after miscarrying to prevent further miscarriages and after giving birth i also needed further injections for the help in conceiving another child which i did, resulting in a further two children with no problems. There are plenty of sites you can look at, that explain this in greater detail. (goggle Rhesus negative blood and pregnancy) Please understand that this was my reason at the time for my miscarriages and may not be related to anyone here who visits this site expressing there concerns or looking for advise or comfort on there experience, there are many reasons why a woman will miscarriage.
    Why have i at this stage in my life come to your site?
    I have been going through the process of menopause for the last three years > it started with the obvious of missed cycles, which at first was alarming at my age, thinking i was pregnant, after a few visits to my doctor it was noted that i was in the early stages of menopause, in the last 12 months i have only had two cycles which were very brief and lasting two days & blood flow very minimal, three months ago was one of these cycles in which i now know i must have conceived, i am at this very stage of writing this post just coming to the end of the miscarriage >I had noticed that i was putting on weight i was experiencing discomfort in my breasts which had also become larger, all of this i was putting down to the menopause until about 5 weeks ago i noticed a very strong smell, nothing i had ever experienced in my life or any pervious miscarriage, the smell was horrific and i became very concerned when i noticed brown blood was excreting, this took place for just over a week which then turned into a lot of passing clots and the pain was intense, I knew then what was happening. i have been going through this since the 5th Dec > today being the 11th January and i believe that i am almost to the end, though i have made an appointment to see my doctor Tuesday for peace of mind. While many of the woman who i see that have visited your site are young and are trying to conceive and are experiencing this difficult time in miscarriage > I on the other hand was pleased that this process took place naturally for there was obvious reasons why i miscarried at my age. I have always known that a woman going through the menopause is just as likely to conceive as someone that isn't, and my ignorance here has lead to this unpleasant experience of the physical and emotional toll it takes on your body and mind. While i will be taking heed of the precautions i need to take. I hold you all dear in my thoughts to those who are experiencing miscarriage and are wanting to conceive.


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  38. Thank you for writing this. Im currently going through a mc and itt makes me feel like I'm not just really weak. I had to go into hospital because I was soaking more than 3 pads an hour and passing lots of clots (my mc was at 11 weeks). I went in about 3 after waking up at 2am and finally left the hospital because my bleeding had finally calmed down and I'd stopped throwing up at 11.
    This was my second mc (no children yet) but it was nothing like the first. The pain was so intense and all the hospital gave me was a paracetamol when I got there. Im now even terryfied of trying again because of that pain but hearing some one else describe the pain really did make me feel a lot better, like I'm not just a huge pansy and it really is the worst.
    Also thankyou for the smell clarification! I smell a lot worse than the first time and knowing I'm probably not infected (no fever) is some comfort there. I'm so embarrased about it I keep asking my other half if he can smell it because family keep coming over to give sympathy ! Ah just leave me to stink in peace!
    But seriously thank you for letting me know I'm not just a huge wimp.

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    1. I'm sorry for your loss, but I am glad that things are progressing well for you. It sounds like the end might be in sight. Good luck!

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  39. Hello, I just found out at 15 weeks my baby died at 13 weeks. two days later I passed the baby , (which was yesterday) and a bunch of chunks but i don't think it was the placenta. Is it dangerous if the placenta is in for a few days after the baby? I really don't want the scraping. I'm not bleeding much, no smells, I am feeling better today, stronger. what about the placenta? Maybe it did pass? I am taking black and blue cohosh to stimulate my uterus.

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    1. In my experience, what you described was the warm up. It can take quite a long time for everything to come out, and so long as you feel okay and have no signs of infection, please try to wait it out. If you start to feel sick or start to bleed excessively, then please go to a doctor. The first time I miscarried, I thought that it was over and done with within the first couple of days, but then it actually happened. My guess is that since you wrote your question, you've probably figured this out. It'll feel like actual labor. Also in my experience, the longer it's in there before coming out, the more it breaks up, which can be a good thing - a bunch of littler chunks coming out instead of a couple bigger ones. Good luck! I'll pray for you.

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  40. Ps thank you for the beautiful warm space to come for such personal advice!
    You are a gem.

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  41. Ok ladies. Its been 14 years since I had my last child and a tubial ligation. Sometimes I smell a dead animal type of a smell during my periods. Sometimes I smell what I can only describe as after birth during my periods. I usually cramp the first 2 days then no cramps, its just a flow. Now, I cramp all month long, bleeding or not. And when I do get my period, the cramping is different from the usual. And now I get alot of back pain which is also not normal for me. Sometimes the blood is bright red and then as the cycle gets closer to the end, maybe about 3-4 days before it ends, it turns into this brownish color and thats when the afterbirth smell kicks in. I clot the entire time I'm bleeding which is new compared to my periods prior to this. This has been happening for the last few months. I havent been to the Dr. out of fear of looking ridiculous considering my tubes are tied and I cant get pregnant. Unsure of whats happening. Any help or advise is welcomed.

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    1. Sorry this took me a few days to respond to. It sounds to me like you are entering the very beginning of menopause. My own mother had a partial hysterectomy (the uterus was removed but not the ovaries), and I haven't gotten there yet, so I don't know for sure, but this really sounds like the changes that come with menopause. I honestly would go to a doctor to talk about it because if you are not old enough for menopause, this could signal hormonal changes that need to be checked out. Try finding an older female doctor so that she herself has either been through or has at least read up on these things. That would probably be the best type of doctor to listen to you and take you seriously. Good luck!

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  42. A little concerned that you are calling anything but a natural miscarriage an abortion. I had a D&C a few weeks ago because our baby had no heartbeat. My baby had been without a heartbeat for two weeks and I was not wanting to continue the stressful wait any further. I did not then, nor do I now, think I was having an abortion performed. I lost my baby and that was painful enough but to say I had an abortion only makes the situation more painful. If I misunderstood what you were trying to say, I apologize.

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    1. That is not what I said. I defined the term Natural Miscarriage as a Miscarriage that happens without any medical intervention. I then said that in my opinion ALL miscarriages are Natural (medical intervention or not) because if they weren't natural, they'd be abortions. Meaning that if a miscarriage (the act of the baby dying), didn't happen naturally, then it would have had to happen on purpose.
      I am not judging anything in any way here. I was simply trying to explain why I was using the term Natural Miscarriage as opposed to just Miscarriage.

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    2. Thanks for all the stories you ladys shared i am 26 i had my very first miscarriage the doctor's never could found out how many weeks,months i were or anythin when i found out i was with child i was bleeding two weeks later i was told by the doctor i miscarried after goin to the doctor every two days for them to test the level of my Beta in my blood. Now baby gone blood gone and the smell have came didnt knw wat to do until i research and found a group of out spoken ladys thanks again. Feel so much better

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  43. I had a miscarriage but with the help of medicine, i was only 5 weeks. I really thought i was just expecting to see red clots and that is mainly what i saw. I waited 3 days after taking the medication and got an ultrasound which showed i was CLEARED. So i went home thinking it was the end of it, however, a pink spotting continued for a month. No, pain, nothing. Suddenly, I started bleeding a little heavier with some cramps (pain scale 1-10, it was a 2). I really thought it was my period finally coming and after 6 days of moderate bleeding, i pushed something out. It was a small ball, it looked hard, white and red. So, i knew there, that it had never came out till after a month of having taken that medication. I guess, my body did it naturally knowing it was already dead. I can't believe it did not show in my ultrasound thou. I guess it was hidding? So, it's been 6 days now since it finally and officially came out but i am still bleeding slightly and i have noticed a smell for the past 2 days and a little cold at times but my temperature if never higher than 98 F. I could say i have been bleeding on and off for 6 weeks in total now. I am not sure on what to do, if wait a little longer still or...?

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    1. I personally would wait since the bleeding can take a long time. However, if you feel any reason that you'd like to go to the doctor, then please do. It's better to be safe than sorry. That said, if all you have is bleeding, I'm not sure the doctor can do anything for you :-(
      Sorry and good luck!

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  44. I'm 12 weeks pregnant. I have two healthy babies, never any symptoms with them. I threw up.. maybe once? I didn't know I was pregnant with my second until I was 2 1/2 months pregant. I was nursing my son, on the mini pill, and never got my period. I noticed my stomach got bigger (I'm active and around 125lbs) and I took a pregnancy test at home.

    With this baby, I knew because I had my period. (Used the caya, which I loved...but I forgot it and..pregnant)
    I had stomach pains at first and thought it was a growing uterus. That stopped about three weeks ago, along with my morning sickness. I started spotting monday night (so four days now). Now it's red and a bit heavier, but not like a period. And it smells. Some of it is coming out a lot thicker, and sometimes browner and thicker, but doesn't look like clots (sorry for tmi).

    I don't want to do to the dr for insurance, and I feel like if I'm miscarring they can't do anything.

    Does anyone have any thoughts? Do I need to see a dr or is it still early?

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    1. That does sound like a miscarriage to me, I'm so sorry :-(
      As for whether or not you should go to the doctor, that's a tricky question because there are so many things involved. #1 - if it is actually a miscarriage, there isn't much they can do for you - unless you want them to D+C to get it over with. #2 - It could actually be something else entirely. Such as the placenta in the wrong spot causing spotting. Thus you could be having a more or less normal pregnancy... however, the smell... I'm pretty sure the smell is the clue that indicates miscarriage.
      Which brings me to #3: You aren't truly going to know for sure unless you pass the sac or the doctor tells you if the baby has died (or not). Thus the REAL decision is can you live with the uncertainty of not knowing for sure?
      I personally can handle just about anything so long as I know what it is, so I would go into the doctor just to get confirmation of miscarriage (and vicodin!), but I know others who can just wait and see. Either way, I hope things go well for you :-)

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  45. Hi there I had a slight bleed at exactly 12 weeks. Went for an early scan but they won't confirm I've had a missed misscarriage I have to go back for a scan in two weeks. Over the weekend I've seen a small amount of blood only when wiping after I've been to the toilet generally light or dark brown not red. Don't know what to do the doctor says there is a slight chance there may be a baby there but too early to detect a heart beat or it may just be I lost the original baby and I've had a missed miscarriage I just wish there was a way of confirming it. I'm not in any pain just wish I knew what was happening to my body

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    1. I really hope I don't sound harsh, but in my experience, if you think you are 12 weeks along but they can't find a heartbeat, then yes, you've probably miscarried. From this point, it can still take several weeks for your body to go through with the miscarriage. The spotting will slowly get heavier until your body is ready to go into labor. If you haven't reached that stage by the time you go back in - or if you do reach that stage and have the ability to call or email your doctor - I personally would ask for some heavy duty pain killers. The actual labor portion of it can hurt every bit as much as if a full term baby was coming out. I am so sorry! I hope this resolves quickly for you. Good luck.

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  46. praise the lord, i am jessica long by name and am from uk, i have been married for the past 20years without no fruit of the womb, i was so disturbed as i entered into my menopus at the age of 51, i felt that i have been forgotten not untill one day as i was searching the internet if i still gat the chance to conceive then i was directed to a page where a woman also gave a testimony about some harbal healer who helped her with some medicine in her menopus stage and now she can carry her own child, i decided to contact this man with faith and then he gave me an response to cut the long story short bredren i was finally brought this medicine, he asked me to take the medicine before going to bed with my husband, bredren when i actually followed his instruction hold and behold two months later i was confirmed pregnant by my doctor and now am a mother, some people make take my story as fake but please for those of you that believe this please here is the personal email of the traditional healer-infertilitycurecenter@gmail.com i promise he will give you the solution you seek once again his email is infertilitycurecenter@gmail.com

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  47. I am currently going through my third miscarriage. My first one was my first pregnancy in Feb 2012. We had a heartbeat at 7 weeks, but when I went in at 11 weeks, there was no heartbeat, and baby only measured 8 weeks. My dr did not give me the option to wait since we were moving across the state in 3 weeks. I struggled with a D&C since it is the same process as an abortion, and I am 100% pro-life. It did make the process simpler since I was knocked out.

    I had a precious girl in Feb 2013, and my precious boy in Aug 2014.

    We stopped preventing in July 2015, and I fully expected it to happen quickly. It didn't. In Oct 2015, my best friend miscarried at 20 weeks. She had to be induced in the hospital. It was hard, but I was there for her, even though she started saying some awful things. In Nov 2015, I had a chemical pregnancy. I never told my friend. However, we found out we were pregnant again in Dec 2015. I didn't feel right about the pregnancy, so I wasn't too surprised my 8 week ultrasound showed no heartbeat and growth stopping at 6 weeks. I have a different dr since my first miscarriage (thankful for that!!!), and she has allowed me to wait. I had nothing until last Thursday when I had a small gush of brown. I had nothing after that unless I wiped, and it was pink tinged mucous. I had a little flow on Friday, but Saturday morning at 3 am, I started passing large clots for an hour. It just wasn't stopping, so I went to the er. Hubby stayed home with the kids which was best since it got intense in the er. After about 20 minutes, I coughed, and this clot the size of a man's fist plopped out. I continued to bleed and pass clots. As they were doing the ultrasound, cramping was very intense, and I passed out. They got me started on fluids, and it was awful pain. The dr was talking about admitting me, but all the sudden, the bleeding stopped. The ultrasound confirmed I still hadn't passed the baby (products of conception kills me to say), and I had more to go. They sent me home on cytotec which helped pass a few more clots, but it didn't get all. I called first thing this morning (Monday), and I asked for a second round of cytotec. They wanted an ultrasound where the tech showed me I still have some stuff in there, although she couldn't identify the baby this time. Of course the dr was slammed, and she is off tomorrow, but I am hoping I can get an answer tomorrow. I found this blog because I also noticed the smell. Thank you for sharing.

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    1. By the way, I had to tell my friend I needed space since I hadn't told her about this pregnancy, either. She didn't take it well, and she made it all about her. There comes a point where you have to decide to move forward with life. Grief is a tricky thing since it is different for everyone, but you still can make a choice to move forward. I knew I would not be allowed to move forward with my life if I continued to let my friend say all the awful things she was saying. She even had the guts to minimize my first miscarriage. Anyway, I didn't throw that part in.

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  48. You can purchase any sort of cycle items you need (including disposables, menstrual cup usa

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  49. Hello everyone, I'm sorry so many of us have to go through something this rough. I found out yesterday at my ultrasound that there is no heartbeat, and the baby has essentially been dead for four weeks now. No signs of bleeding or cramping yet. Lost my first child this way and I do remember the blood and pain for hours. This was to be our last baby, and makes me a little scared to even try again. I'll make sure to call my doctor and get a jump on the meds! I did have a d&c the first time after the pain and bleeding had almost subsided, but I've chosen to stay at home for this one, seeing as my insurance also does not cover the procedure. Thanks for all of your tips, sure hope it goes as smoothly as it can I guess. To all of you mom's out there, keep your head up, we are all together in this. Heartbreak and sorrow doesn't begin to describe how it feels. Love to you all....

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  50. Hello everyone, After 6 years trying to conceive I finally got pregnant 3 weeks after I contacted Priest Iyare from his website http://iyareyarespellstemple.webs.com/ It was simply amazing. I had history of recurrent miscarriages and was also diagnosed with genetic problems but using your system I got pregnant naturally at age 44& after 2 HSGs and 4 negative IUIs including 6 induction Clomid cycles and laparscopy. God will bless you and your good work more and more. I am recommending your program to all my friends. contact him on his website http://iyareyarespellstemple.webs.com/ or email him via iyareyaresolutiontemple@gmail.com and get your problems solved.

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  51. Wow this thread is the best I've come across so far
    11th pregnancy,second m/c. Was 14 weeks baby died at 6w4d.
    Had cessation of pregnancy symptoms around ten weeks and permanent migraine from mid Jan to first week of march when everything finally passed.
    Had passed large clots that literally all fell out of me after several days of light on/off bleeding. Then ended up in worst pain of my life and in hospital for 4days,tried misoprostol orally over two days and lots of large clots did come out and bright red blood that smelt weird to me but no sign of infection of bloods,did have raised temp but midwife said this is normal and inflammation response.
    Discharged myself on the Wed due to sons bday and was in so much PAIN even oxycodones didn't touch it,months of migraines and body pain was taking its toll.
    On the Thurs began drinking extra strong raspberry leaf tea + high doses of vit c (ascorbic acid only) and was still in pain,went to a friends and on way home in car (hubby driving) I could not even sit as mh cervix hurt so much. I knew the GS was in there still and it was beginning to freak me out,I smelt and so I began concentration on my cervix and pushed and pushed and pushed. Almost home and started having spasms which felt like needed to poo and wee all at once so soon as we pulled up I rushed into the toilet, my bladder and bowels emptied with zero effort and then next thing a tennis ball size lump literally ejected itself from my vagina and hit the toilet wall and fell into it.
    Instantly I felt better,my migraine of weeks and weeks had gone,the smell was gone and I fished the ball (sac) out and washed it. Was huge and solid and it had that smell I could smell on the blood. Fascinating. I thought maybe this was abnormal but coming across this thread has helped me see that many others have experienced it and I feel a lot better.
    The Smell is gone,so to is my pain and bleeding is almost ceased.

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    1. I'm so sorry you went through this, but I'm glad it worked out in the end. Sounds like part of your problem was that the water never broke, and so your sac had to come out whole, which I'm sure made it much harder.
      Have a virtual hug and try to remember that it gets better :-)

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  52. I don't know if anything makes you feel better, but at least you know you're not alone. I had two natural miscarriages years back. Lots of cramping like an awful period and bleeding that soaked a pad in an hour. Smelled like metal, but enough to make me light headed. Felt kind of like I had the flu without a fever. The worst part was when I passed what was obviously my almost 2 months along baby's precious little body. That was the part that broke me both times. If you are lucky enough not to see that, be grateful. Because of my beliefs I took some comfort from the fact that I could at least bury their tiny bodies, instead of having them disposed of as medical waste. There is no comfort except that I will see my babies again in heaven, really, and that doesn't do much right now, here. But you are not alone. Much love to you and your babies.

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  53. I cried reading this because on Friday at 8 weeks and 1 day my baby had no heart beat at 4 weeks there was a bleed behind the sack 3 weeks after I started to bleed and went in and was told I was hemorrhaging but baby was fine heart rate was fine one week later baby had died my body couldnt miscarry on its own it had tried but it couldnt so they gave me the pills to help it along and do it at home in the comfort of my family they gave me Percocet because im allergic to Vic and can't take it I took the first 4 pills around 8 pm right after I had given my son his sleeping meds because he hasn't been sleeping through the night so I knew I could sit and relax for the night with in the first few hours I painfully passed 2 big blood clots and the bleeding slowed a lot I at 2am I had to take the other 4 pills to make sure my body had passed the baby on Saturday I wasn't cramping anymore wasn't passing clots and felt a lot better and then Sunday came and that night I started cramping like I was having contractions couldnt breath through I go to the bathroom and the second I sit down and push I passed about 10 or so small blood clots and the pain stopped with in the hour of passing those I freaked out because I had miscarried at 6weeks baby had no heart beat two years ago either and my uterus opened up and started passing clots the size of lemons any ways I was worried that that would happen this time and recently have been cramping on and off since Sunday night and passing small clots im terribly allergic to all bass pantie liners tampons whatever and I use the disposable cups and was told i can't use them so I am currently still bleeding a bit heavy and suffering through what I call a diaper rash because I don't have the money to go get extra cloths I want to cry because a miscarriage is a cruel fucking joke that god wants to play on us not only do I have to suffer losing a second baby but my body isn't good enough to pass it with out help and not only that but apparently he felt we deserved to go through the physical pain during this entire fucking time and seeing the baby passed in the toilet and dealing with the bleeding and the clots and feeling of being exhausted its all a big fucking joke and I just don't want to exist anymore I feel defective and broken and it all just keeps pulling on top of itself I apologize for the rant I just have literally no one to talk to about this and I dont know how to feel shout it but angry and heart broken

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